Depression is a mix of good days and bad days.
Today was a bad day; a sad day. An I-don’t-know-how-to-make-things-better day.
I just got done sitting outside under the full moon, watching my breathing and trying to center myself and find some direction as to what I should do next.
I still don’t have that answer, but I know my head is just messing with me. It’s not real; none of these feelings are, even though they seem real. That empty hopeless wanting to cry feeling. That’s not real; it’s something wrong with my brain – bad connections. Maybe it’s not producing enough of the right chemicals.
This knowledge makes me feel better.
Depression is an ugly lie – it creeps into every aspect of your life until it utterly destroys everything even slightly good.
It’s almost won twice. It’s not going to win again.
It’s all in your head. So tell your head, “Not today, Satan. Not today.”
Be firm. Be final. And most importantly, take another step forward. You’re the only one who can silence the monster in your head for good. Tell it to shut up.
You know you’re better than how you feel. Remember the last time you felt invincible and on top of the world.
Know those feelings were just chemicals, too. It’s easy; embrace that memory.
And most of all, know that you choose to live another day; you get another day to try and make it better.
And it will get better – I promise. You’re stronger than your messed up mind.
Keep repeating that until you believe it because it’s true.
Don’t let today be the day the monster gets you.
PS. If it’s really bad reach out to someone. You’re not alone, even though I know it feels like it. Call 1-800-273-8255 Available 24 hours everyday. ❤❤❤